My personal ethics as a Dominant
"Mastery
does not come from dabbling. We have to be prepared to pay the price. We need
to have the sustained enthusiasm that motivates us to give our best."
My
personal ethics is an important aspect of My role as a Professional and
Lifestyle Dominant. It is the core of My being and without strong personal
ethics, I would not be blessed with the devotion of My slaves and submissives.
A
couple of general points about domination first before I mention specifics
about My ethics:
1. True dominance comes when a Dominant is
able to master and control themselves first, everything else becomes a natural
progression. A Dominant who rants, raves or punishes a sub when angry is
totally out of control and that is the exact opposite to what BDSM is about. BDSM
is NOT an excuse for abuse and if you cannot control yourself, how are you
expected to control your sub?
2. Domination is not just about the technical
know-how of your craft – anyone can learn the technique if they apply
themselves. It is the way in which you approach, feel, and subsequently apply
your skills which is highly significant. Domination is not about going through
the motions. “Acting” may serve as a temporary reprieve however, if you do not have
the love and enthusiasm from your heart, soul and mind for what you do, the
outer shell of pretence will eventually crack and expose the insincerity
within.
The
following qualities are the basis of My personal and professional ethics and
that is the perspective I am writing from. Having said that, I do expect My submissives
to possess the essence of such qualities themselves. Many of these are interrelated
and they are not in any order of preference as I consider them all to be of
equal importance:
RESPONSIBILITY
“Knowing is not enough;
we must apply. Willing is not enough; we must do.”
When
submissives offer their submission to Me, I consider it a precious gift and I never see it as an automatic right. With
that gift comes a great deal of responsibility – the well being of My
submissives now falls upon My shoulders.
TRUST
“Without trust, words
become the hollow sound of a wooden gong.
Without
trust, there can be no Dominance or submission. Implicit trust from both sides
is absolutely essential for total submission or Domination to take place. My
submissives need to feel that they can trust Me implicitly and I am always
conscious of their dependence on Me to protect them, especially when they are
at their most vulnerable during play. They cannot truly be themselves if they
cannot completely let go of their inhibitions due to lack of trust.
COMMUNICATION
“Self-expression must
pass into communication for its fulfilment.”
So
very important – without it, situations become misconstrued, directions become
unclear and mistakes will happen. Personal growth for My submissives cannot
happen without good, clear, concise communication, nor can O/our understanding
of each other evolve.
RESPECT
“Respect yourself if you would have
others respect you.”
Respect
given, will be returned in kind. You cannot demand respect, it will come to you
when you deserve it. If I want My submissives to respect Me as a Domme, I give
the same level of respect to them. I EARN My respect from them in return by
what I do.
HONOUR & INTEGRITY
“Nobody can acquire
honour by doing what is wrong.”
“Never separate the
life you live from the words you speak.”
My
actions speak louder than words. My submissives will expect Me to keep My word and
they know that when I tell them I will do something, it WILL happen. My policy
is to not to say anything I feel I cannot follow through. I remain honest in
all I do for Myself and for My submissives. There is no point in cheating or
making shallow promises, you only end up short changing yourself and your
reputation. Honour and integrity in turn builds greater trust and respect.
COMPASSION
“If you light a lamp
for somebody, it will also brighten your path.”
My
submissives need Me to understand that they are real people with real feelings
and needs just as much as I am. I show interest in what they do and in the events
which occur in their lives. Listening and responding to their needs makes My
D/s bond with them stronger and more profound.
CONSISTENCY
“There must be
consistency in direction.”
As a Domme, I have to be consistent in
how I treat My submissives. Nothing confuses a submissive more than when their
Domme keeps moving the goal posts or punishes for a misdemeanour on one
occasion and not for the same misdemeanour on the next. I avoid placing
conflicting demands upon My subs and I give equal rewards when I am pleased
with them.
HUMILITY
"We come nearest
to the great when we are great in humility."
As a Domme and a person (because the
two are intertwined), I realise I will not always be correct. As much as I
learn and become proficient within My craft, life in all its richness and
knowledge is a continuous learning experience and there is always more I can
learn and improve upon. My submissives know that on the rare occasion if I make
a mistake, they will get an apology from Me as they rightly deserve. The lesser
Dominant in My view is the one who cannot even admit their mistake in the first
place.
SAFETY
“Safety doesn't happen
by accident.”
In My capacity as a Lifestyle and
Professional Domme, it is imperative to be well aware of the potential damage I
can cause to My submissives. I thoroughly acquaint Myself with the possible
dangers involved with the different BDSM activities I engage in and I do not take
unnecessary risks. My First Aid skills are kept up-to-date and I take every
care to ensure My submissives are not injured during play. My motto here is: Prepare
and prevent, don't repair and repent!
These are the ten values I highly
regard and I do My utmost to follow these principles, not only for Myself but
for My slaves and submissives. Now is the perfect opportunity to thank My
slaves and submissives for entrusting Me with their beautiful gifts of
submission.




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